May 9, 2008

Hatin Ass Hoes

I wrote this last year and published it on my personal My Space page, but today I was inspired to move it here.


Hatin Ass Hoes

I think it's time again for someone to say this because it doesn't seem to be getting through to a lot of you.

There is no reason to be mad at a chick just because she's talking to a dude you like. It's immature, petty and completely unladylike.

Let me impart some advice:

The way to fuck a man (or whatever you want to do with him) is NOT to whine, bitch or complain about the chick he is currently fucking. The way to fuck a man (or whatever you want to do with him) is to step your damn game up and go get him. The only time to ever let some other chick stand in the way of a man you want is if he is married. Marriage is (or at least it should be) a sacred union that no one has the right to mess around with.

Let me make that plain for you hood rats out there: If a man is married, don't be a sleazy tramp and try to fuck him anyways. It's tacky, classless, completely unladylike and whorish to boot. I don't care if the entire time he was engaged the two of you were hooking up like crazy, after he says "I do", you DON'T.

Now, back to dudes that aren't settled in relationships or what have you. The man that you want is the only important party involved in your quest to hand over your goodies on a silver platter. Any and all females he might or might not be dealing with do not concern you. They do not concern you because they are not what is standing in the way of you getting to him. He is the one standing in the way of you getting to him. If he chooses to only have one girl at a time, either wait your turn or convince him that his current chick is old news. If he is a slut and doesn't care about monogamy, then take his rejection as a hint that he just doesn't want you. Either way, he and no one else is influencing his decision to not sleep with your tacky ass. Sorry.

No amount of glaring at or gossiping about the girl he is involved with is going to make him want you. Only you can make him want you. Ladies are you hearing me? I don't think some of you are. I think this calls for an anecdote.

In my wild and crazy youth there was a man. Actually, there was a healthy amount of men, but this one in particular. He was tall, smart, funny and unimaginably sexy. He still is. Anyway, I wanted him. I flirted, I teased, I threw him coy smiles and guess what? I got him. Now, to do this I had to pretty much ignore his girlfriend, which was kinda shady of me since we were on friendly like terms, but I was such a raging bitch at 18 so I get a pass. When she found out (and I still to this day have no idea how she did that) she got all in my face about it. She spread lies about me, talked shit about me, glared at me surrounded by her high and mighty friends, the works. But uh, she stayed with him. And he stayed with me. In fact, after they broke up and moved on, we still continued to, uh, well you get my drift.

Now, what lesson did we all learn from this? We learned that no female is going to stand in the way of the man you want. If it seems like I'm repeating myself, it's because I am. Because no matter how much sense what I'm saying makes, I know that there are still gonna be a legion of tacky, uncute, chubby, classless hootchies and aging baby mamas getting mad when the dude they like ain't payin them no attention. Get over it heffas!

LMAO.......I'm so evil when I'm trying to act bad.

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